I swear, I have been holding on not to kill myself, i went through Google to read about depression and it's exactly how I am feeling, I don't know what to do, I don't enjoy doing anything, even the things I used to enjoy doing before, no matter how much I false myself to do them now I get tired thinking am just wasting my time, i dont feel like doing anything at all, i prefer to sleep, i even false myself to eat , i dont like to be around anybody always like to be alone, so many things on my head, my mind is always telling me that kiiling myself is the best opion, i dont know how it started and how to be happy and start living the way i used to, i have been trying and is not working, i cry for no reason, i even think of things i have not achieve in my life and whenever i start thinking that particular thing i will be feeling more depressed, sometimes i will be thinking maybe am hiv possitive, so many things on my head at a time, i dont just know how i got myself into this situation, i think of stupid things, the problem now is, if i continue like this ,i dont know what will happon, sometimes i will go to the bathroom just stand there be looking at the liguid we used to wash the ground /toliet and my mind will be telling me to take it and drink, i have been doing that but one of my mind will be telling me, why will u do a thing like that, i dont know if its spiritual or depression, i just cant explain to u guys the way i feel, nobody will understand me or my problems, am so tired and dont know what to do, i swear, am not joking and i dont even know what the problem is, if u ask me now, i will not say anything reasonable, i will just be crying