Monogamy- A Christian point of view - Tola Adeniyi
Marriage and Marrying More Wives

MARRIAGE FALLACY
- by Tola Adeniyi

If we Christians keep insisting on this fallacy called One-man/One-wife, too many ladies will end up sleeping with different married men secretly while trying to make money and waiting for their own husband. Too many ladies will remain in their parents house till their 30s and some will live alone till their 40s. Most women who lose their husbands in their 40s and 50s will never find another man to marry them legitimately; they will end up sleeping around with different men.
GET IT RIGHT:
Men and women are not equal and God never made us to be equal. Lets stop adopting all these American law that force Christian men to marry only one wife, while leaving several Christian ladies without husband, leading to many of them doing "bad things" in secret.
Sincerely, I was at a Church Service recently for Widows and a Pastor who wanted to give food items to
the over 100 widows said: "Any woman in this service who can boldly say she has not opened her legs for any man since her husband died should come out to the front". Sadly, the number of women, in their 40s and 50s, who came out were less than 20.
That is the reality that we Christians are hiding from.
Full details below...
Read this very interesting piece by Tola Adeniyi: THE AGONY OF MONOGAMY
It was at the church service for the 90th birthday of the legendary matriarch of the Awo dynasty Chief Dr Hannah Dideolu Awolowo in Ikenne that the thoughts that prompted this article began. Some well known highly placed gentlemen and their wives were called upon to partake in the wine sipping, bread breaking ritual called Holy Communion. As soon as these respectable ladies and gentlemen, all of them past age 70, and amongst whom were renowned professors, high court judges, legal luminaries and business moguls, finished their spiritual blessing and were returning to their seats, they caught a pitiable sight in their over-flowing garb of hypocrisy.
They wore forlorn mien plastered with furrowed frowned faces like some one afflicted with putrid smell of heavy dose of fart. They looked as if they were mourning a three-year-old boy mistakenly killed by his own father, or the passing of a poor woman who has just succumbed to excruciatingly painful cancer. They clung to their wives as if they were newly wedded. I temporarily forgot that I was in a holy church, the spiritual enclave of Christians. I almost laughed my head off because I knew each of the ‘holy’ ‘monogamous’ men intimately and by Jove, I knew of their second, third or fourth wives/liaisons/mistre sses with whom they had sired several children. To the whole world they were champions of monogamy, but to their hearts and conscience they were celebrated polygamists, or at best, serial monogamists. Pshaw!
I saw pain written all over them, the agony of living a lie, the unease of hypocrisy, and the shame of going through life pretending to be what you are not. This is the sort of agony a lot of the so-called monogamists go through all their lives. The series of lies they sell to their wives, and the double life they present to their pastors and church leaders, most of whom are actually equally guilty of hypocrisy and double life living.
This piece is not set out to condemn or criticize monogamy. Monogamy is perfect for those who believe in its concept and can genuinely keep to it. I too have been married to one lovely woman for almost 45 years and it has been like a marriage made in heaven. I happen also to be the promoter along with some friends the 35-year-old Family Club of Nigeria which is dedicated to the upliftment and celebration of marriage and family values.
The article is designed to expose the hypocrisy and pain associated with embracing false notions which are really not observed by any culture in the world, and to advise those who erroneously sentence themselves to a