I leave a lot behind. My parents. My siblings. My girlfriend...

I leave a lot behind. My parents. My siblings. My girlfriend. But it is for the better. I will leave home. Barely any money. Will find a new city. Meet new people. New opportunities. Start my life from scratch. This is for the better. I'm sure it is. It must be. I am really indecisive, but i do not have any other options. It is either this or my family moves me back to my home country. I know barely anything of that country. THIS is my home. I will leave on Thursday, May 19th 2016. I don't feel bad about doing this to my family. They sent me to hospital 16 days ago. Why should I feel bad. I do feel very bad about doing this to my girlfriend. She saw a future in us. Heck, I saw a future in us. But I can't take this life anymore. I know I will not be able to take the life that will come to me in my home country.
So to my girlfriend, V, this isn't a "good-bye", but rather a "see you soon". I love you and will never forget you.
To my friends, thanks for being there, great memories, will always remember you guys.
To the hospital staff, thanks for believing in me.
To everyone i've let down, I truly am sorry, I tried.
And to everyone else whom this may concern, I will come back stronger than ever.
Just watch me.
P.S. Sorry for short points, I am literally typing everything that pops up in my head, all the emotions etc. If you want the backstory behind this, I'll gladly make another post with all the explanation, I have till Thursday anyways

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