Class as a barrier to your marriage

NNEKA seems to be at her tether‘s end after her greying mother paid her a visit in the city last
week. The unscheduled visit is one of the many she had undertaken in recent times to implore her daughter to get married and start bearing children. An only child and exasperated by her mother‘s pleas, she has vowed not to have anything to do with any man that falls short of her standard, including her former schoolmate.

”Chinedu is well behaved,” she starts. ”What he lacks in material wealth he makes up for in his decent manners. Although he has expressed his desire to marry me, I cannot accede to his request because he does not belong to my class.

”My friends will sneer at me if they discover the man proposing marriage to me squats in his uncle‘s house and does not even have a car. On my last birthday, he said he had prepared a surprise for me, which turned out to be dinner in a shoddy restaurant in his locality. I barely touched the ill-prepared meal.”

”My mother barely responds to the greetings of Kola whenever he visits our home,” explains Sayo. ”She says he is not good enough for me because he is not rich. I have tried to let her understand that he is hard-working, but she will have none of that. She has even threatened to disown me if I bring disgrace to the family by marrying him.”

Ask Kayode, he will tell you that the only language Laraba understands is that of money. Kayode says, ”Every week, she makes monetary demands running into tens of thousands of naira. Anytime I fail to meet up with her demands, she threatens to walk out of the relationship. Not even my entreaties that I am responsible for the education of my four siblings will make her budge.

”Last month she embarked on one of her usual shopping sprees and she assumed I would foot the bill. I politely turned down her request and suggested she settled the expenses using her salary, while promising to reimburse when my finances improved. She stopped visiting and remained incommunicado to register her protest. If only she knows I have since found myself a lady who has since proven to be prudent.”

In his mid 30s, Johnbull is yet to be married because he has not found the right woman. In his own estimation, the true candidate must belong to one of the affluent families in the society. ”I have known poverty all my life and cannot continue to live from hand to mouth. Whoever I will marry must come from an affluent background or I will remain a bachelor for life,” he says.

”I don‘t love Kelechi, but my parents insist I must marry him to cement the business ties between both families. According to them, the man I love, Kambili, does not belong to our class. My mum said if I go ahead and marry him, she will not come to the Egbeda area of Lagos to do the traditional omugwo when I am delivered of a baby,” laments Kate.

According to Sunday, who is a sophomore at the University of Benin, he is only attracted to rich kids. ”I do not associate with indigent students,” says Sunday. ”For you to be my girlfriend, you must have plenty of cash to spend. The amount of money you have will determine the extent of my love for you. The more the merrier.”

Modele has remained in a confused state ever since she discovered she is three months pregnant for her older lover. ”I don‘t love Alhaji but I love his money,” she laments. ”He spends lavishly and that is what attracted me to him. Now I am pregnant and he is pressing for an abortion. He says he does not want a fifth wife as his religion only permits four and I do not want to become a single mother. What if I die in the process of procuring an abortion? See what the crave for money has done to me.”